Where men and women turn for emotional support and social connection

About three-quarters of American adults (74%) say they are very or very likely to turn to a spouse or partner if they need emotional support.

Men and women alike will say that they would rely on their spouse or partner in this way.

Mothers and friends are also frequent sources of support: 48% of adults point out their mother and 46% a friend as someone they would very or very likely go to. Smaller shares would go to the father (28%) or another family member (35%).

There are significant gender differences when it comes to certain sources of support. By margins ranging from 12 to 18 percentage points, a greater share of women than men say they would be extremely or very likely to switch:

• Their mother (54% of women compared to 42% of men)
• Friend (54% vs. 38%)
• Another family member who is not their parent, spouse or partner (44% versus 26%)

Turning to mental health professionals and online communities

Americans are less likely to say they would turn to a mental health professional for emotional support than to say they would turn to family or friends. About one in five adults (19%) say they would be very or very likely to see a mental health professional for this type of support.

Some demographic groups are more likely than others to say they are very or very likely to seek out a mental health professional:

• Women are more likely to say this than men (22% vs. 16%).
• Black (26%) and Hispanic (25%) adults are more likely to say this than white (16%) and Asian (17%) adults.
• Adults under 50 are more likely to say this than those 50 and older (24% vs. 14%).

When it comes to seeking emotional support from online platforms or communities, relatively small shares of adults say they are very or very likely to do so (5% overall).

Getting emotional support today versus 20 years ago

We also asked Americans how they think men and women are compared to 20 years ago in terms of having someone they can turn to for emotional support. Overall, the public thinks that men and women work better in these areas than two decades ago.

About 47% of adults say that men do a lot or a little better, 20% say that they do a lot or somewhat worse, and 32% say that they are doing neither better nor worse. The pattern is similar for women: 51% say they are doing better, 14% say they are doing worse, and 34% say neither better nor worse.

Women say it more often than men men these days they are better when it comes to having someone they can turn to for emotional support (51% vs. 42%). The shares of men (50%) and women (52%) are similar. women are doing better compared to 20 years ago.

Communicating with friends

We also asked the Americans about their friends and how they stay in touch with them. About eight in ten adults (81%) say they have at least one close friend – not including their family members – and most (64%) have more than one close friend. About one in five (18%) say they have no close friends.

Among adults who have close friends, 74% say they connect with one at least a few times a week, either by texting, interacting on social media, talking on the phone or video chatting, or seeing them in person.

Texting is the most common form of communication between friends. Most adults with close friends (61%) say they text them several times a week or daily.

Significant shares also communicate with friends on social media (39%) or talk to them via phone or video chat (35%). About three in ten (29%) say they see a close friend in person at least a few times a week.

Differences according to gender and age

There are big differences in how often men and women interact with close friends on social media. Women are more likely than men to say they often communicate in these ways by a margin of 10 points or more.

Women are also slightly more likely than men to talk on the phone or video chat with a close friend at least a few times a week (38% vs. 32%). However, men (31%) are somewhat more inclined than women (28%) to say that they often see their friends in person.

This gender gap is fairly consistent among adults aged 30 to 49, 50 to 64, and 65 and older. However, among those under 30, men and women are about equally likely to interact with close friends in these ways.

Looking at age alone, adults under 30 are the most likely to say they text (72%) or interact on social media (60%) with a close friend at least a few times a week. Those aged 65 and over are the least likely to say they regularly use these forms of communication.